Introduction
Are you walking through a broken relationship, and if you’re honest, are you being pulled toward bitterness, isolation, or coping in ways that can’t heal you? Here is the central discipleship challenge I want to put in front of you: in seasons like divorce, single parenting, or relational loss, Jesus is inviting you to draw closer through prayer, gratitude, and community, so your pain doesn’t harden you, but transforms you and equips you to love others.
Broken relationships can bring deep grief and confusion, but they can also become a turning point in your maturity. I want to help you learn how to pray in this season and how to let the church family support you well.
Main Points
Are you walking through a broken relationship, and if you’re honest, are you being pulled toward bitterness, isolation, or coping in ways that can’t heal you? Here is the central discipleship challenge I want to put in front of you: in seasons like divorce, single parenting, or relational loss, Jesus is inviting you to draw closer through prayer, gratitude, and community, so your pain doesn’t harden you, but transforms you and equips you to love others.
Broken relationships can bring deep grief and confusion, but they can also become a turning point in your maturity. I want to help you learn how to pray in this season and how to let the church family support you well.
Let Prayer Keep You Near Jesus
Nothing brings you to your knees like suffering, and divorce especially has a way of stripping away self-reliance. There may be days when you want a composed prayer time, but all you can do is cry and pray. Don’t despise that.
Scripture gives you permission to pour out your heart like David does in the Psalms. God is not asking you to perform; He is inviting you to come close. In this season, the fight is often not just for your circumstances to change, but for your heart to stay soft toward God.
One of the real dangers is that pain can “set you up for bitterness” and draw you away from the Lord. So I’m urging you: don’t withdraw, draw nearer. Even weak prayers are real prayers when they are offered to a real Father.
Choose “Better,” Not Bitter
Here’s a simple but piercing discipleship lens: the difference between getting bitter or better is one letter. The choice is real, and it shows up in daily spiritual habits.
Bitterness tells you:
- “You’re alone.”
- “You’re a victim forever.”
- “God forgot you.”
- “You have the right to stay angry.”
But the Spirit leads you toward:
- honest grief without hopelessness,
- repentance where needed,
- forgiveness as God enables,
- and a future that is not defined by this wound.
Let this season become a refining fire rather than a poison. Ask God to convert your wounds into wisdom and compassion.
Practice Gratitude in Your Darkest Hours
When you’re in the darkest hour, your feelings will tell you to pray, “Fix this, heal me, change them, they’re at fault.” But God often teaches us a counter-formation: thanksgiving.
Hold tightly to Philippians 4:6–7: as you bring “prayer and petition” with thanksgiving, “the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
I want you to practice this the way it was modeled: set aside 15–30 minutes where you do nothing but give thanks. Thank Jesus for the cross. Thank Him for promises like:
- Romans 8:28 (“all things work together for good…”),
- Romans 8:1 (“no condemnation…”),
- and thank Him for daily mercies, food, a bed, shelter, small evidences of care.
This might not immediately “fix” your situation, but it can guard and heal your inner life, your heart and mind, so you can stand again. Scripture also says, “give thanks always” (cf. 1 Thessalonians 5:18), not only when life is easy. Even Paul and Silas praised God in prison (cf. Acts 16). Thanksgiving is spiritual warfare against despair.
Slow Down and Process With God, Not Escapes
Prayer doesn’t only energize you, it can also calm you, slow you down, and help you perceive what’s happening more clearly. You begin to breathe again and say, “Okay God, this is Yours.”
And that matters, because if you don’t process your pain with God (and in healthy support), you’re more vulnerable to substitutes:
- pornography,
- alcohol or drugs,
- compulsive spending,
- relationship-hopping,
- or other numbing patterns.
These offer temporary relief but deepen long-term damage. Discipleship here is practical: bring what’s happening “up here” into words before the Lord. That is a healthier path than medicating your pain with counterfeits.
Fight Loneliness Through Community and Inclusion
One of the most common struggles in divorce and single-parent life is loneliness, and it’s intensified by feeling excluded.
Sometimes church life unintentionally centers on couples and “complete” families, and single moms/dads (and singles in general) don’t get invited because people fear it might feel awkward. But many single parents will tell you plainly: “I want to be included. I want to be around healthy relationships. It gives me hope.”
So here’s discipleship for the whole church family:
- Open your home.
- Invite people into holidays, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Easter, Mother’s Day.
- Invite them into normal life, watch a game, share a meal, let kids play, create a natural environment.
And here’s discipleship for you if you’re the one feeling alone: don’t assume you’re unwanted. Let people know when you need community. Receive care with humility. The body of Christ is meant to carry burdens together.
This also connects to God’s heart for the vulnerable, Scripture repeatedly highlights care for widows and the fatherless (cf. themes throughout the OT and James 1:27). Broken relationships come through divorce, yes, but also through death and many other losses. We do not exclude; we embrace.
Pray for Contentment and Long-Term Healing
If you’re coming out of divorce, I want you to pray for a season of contentment in singleness. Many people rush toward the next relationship as a bandage, without doing the work of healing, heart, emotions, patterns, and spiritual growth. That’s how cycles repeat.
Ask God to build stability and maturity in you. Wisdom may mean giving significant time before considering another relationship, time to let God form you, expose what needs healing, and rebuild your life on Him.
Then ask a second question that re-frames suffering with purpose: “Lord, how do You want to use this for Your kingdom?” 2 Corinthians 1:3–4 teaches that God comforts us in our affliction so we can comfort others. Your pain is not the end of your story, God can make you a minister of comfort to others.
Hold to God’s Purpose: Triumph and Good
Two anchors were emphasized for this season:
-
2 Corinthians 2:14: “Thanks be to God, who always leads us in triumph in Christ…” Even when you feel defeated, God’s Word says He is leading you in triumph. You may not see how yet, but you can ask: “Lord, how are You leading me to triumph through this?”
-
Romans 8:28: God works “all things…for good” for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. This doesn’t call evil “good,” and it doesn’t minimize pain. It means pain isn’t meaningless. You can pray, “Lord, if You give me purpose in this, I will walk through it with You.”
And if you feel like this season is a “black spot” on your Christian resume, hear me gently: God is not finished with you. Your story can still carry the fragrance of Christ to others.
Conclusion
In broken-relationship seasons, prayer is not a nice accessory, it’s survival and transformation. I want you to remember these discipleship steps:
- Come to Jesus honestly, even if all you can do is cry.
- Choose “better,” not bitter.
- Train your soul with thanksgiving (Philippians 4:6–7).
- Process pain with God, not escapes.
- Fight loneliness through community, seek inclusion and offer inclusion.
- Pray for contentment and deep healing before rushing forward.
- Hold tightly to God’s promises of comfort, purpose, and ultimate triumph (2 Corinthians 1:3–4; 2 Corinthians 2:14; Romans 8:28).
God may not immediately change your circumstances, but He will meet you, guard your heart and mind, and shape you into someone who can comfort others.
Father of mercies and God of all comfort, we come to You for those walking through divorce, single parenting, loneliness, grief, and relational loss. Draw them close to You. Teach them to pray honestly, to pour out their hearts, and to receive Your comfort.
Lord Jesus, guard their hearts and minds with Your peace as they bring their requests with thanksgiving. Train them to give thanks even in darkness, and keep them from bitterness, despair, and false escapes. Lead them in paths of repentance, healing, and wise decisions.
Holy Spirit, place the lonely into healthy community. Make our church a family that includes, invites, and loves well, especially around holidays and everyday gatherings. Give contentment in seasons of singleness, and bring deep restoration where there are wounds.
Use what has been painful as a tool for the gospel. Fulfill Your Word: work all things together for good for those who love You, and lead Your people in triumph in Christ. We ask this in Jesus’ name, amen.
Conclusion
In broken-relationship seasons, prayer is not a nice accessory, it’s survival and transformation. I want you to remember these discipleship steps:
- Come to Jesus honestly, even if all you can do is cry.
- Choose “better,” not bitter.
- Train your soul with thanksgiving (Philippians 4:6–7).
- Process pain with God, not escapes.
- Fight loneliness through community, seek inclusion and offer inclusion.
- Pray for contentment and deep healing before rushing forward.
- Hold tightly to God’s promises of comfort, purpose, and ultimate triumph (2 Corinthians 1:3–4; 2 Corinthians 2:14; Romans 8:28).
God may not immediately change your circumstances, but He will meet you, guard your heart and mind, and shape you into someone who can comfort others.
Closing Prayer
Father of mercies and God of all comfort, we come to You for those walking through divorce, single parenting, loneliness, grief, and relational loss. Draw them close to You. Teach them to pray honestly, to pour out their hearts, and to receive Your comfort.
Lord Jesus, guard their hearts and minds with Your peace as they bring their requests with thanksgiving. Train them to give thanks even in darkness, and keep them from bitterness, despair, and false escapes. Lead them in paths of repentance, healing, and wise decisions.
Holy Spirit, place the lonely into healthy community. Make our church a family that includes, invites, and loves well, especially around holidays and everyday gatherings. Give contentment in seasons of singleness, and bring deep restoration where there are wounds.
Use what has been painful as a tool for the gospel. Fulfill Your Word: work all things together for good for those who love You, and lead Your people in triumph in Christ. We ask this in Jesus’ name, amen.