Introduction
Are you waiting for God in Advent while quietly insisting on your own way with the people around you? The central teaching I want you to take in is this: the joy we all want is found on the far side of a deliberate, Christ-shaped love, love that chooses others over self, with a renewed mind, as we wait for Jesus.
Advent is a season to pause and prepare our hearts for Christmas, remembering that Israel waited for the promised Messiah, and now we wait for Christ’s return. And in every kind of waiting (for provision, for answers, for healing, for clarity), Scripture trains us to wait in a God-honoring way. We’ve already considered waiting with hope (our citizenship is in heaven; we won’t be disappointed) and waiting with peace (prayer and thanksgiving guard our hearts). Now we come to what Scripture holds out as the greatest reflection of God’s character: love. Philippians 2:1–4 calls us into that love, especially toward one another.
Main Points
Are you waiting for God in Advent while quietly insisting on your own way with the people around you? The central teaching I want you to take in is this: the joy we all want is found on the far side of a deliberate, Christ-shaped love, love that chooses others over self, with a renewed mind, as we wait for Jesus.
Advent is a season to pause and prepare our hearts for Christmas, remembering that Israel waited for the promised Messiah, and now we wait for Christ’s return. And in every kind of waiting (for provision, for answers, for healing, for clarity), Scripture trains us to wait in a God-honoring way. We’ve already considered waiting with hope (our citizenship is in heaven; we won’t be disappointed) and waiting with peace (prayer and thanksgiving guard our hearts). Now we come to what Scripture holds out as the greatest reflection of God’s character: love.
Philippians 2:1–4 calls us into that love, especially toward one another.
Joy Comes From Love, Not Stuff
Paul writes:
“Therefore if there is any consolation in Christ, if any comfort of love, if any fellowship of the Spirit, if any affection and mercy, fulfill my joy by being like-minded, having the same love, being of one accord, of one mind” (Philippians 2:1–2).
Paul begins by reminding us of what we already have in Christ, consolation, comfort, fellowship, affection, mercy. Then he says, “If these blessings are real to you, here is how you respond: love one another in unity.”
This connects with something I’ve learned the older I get: what we think we want for Christmas, presents, ease, the perfect gathering, is not actually the deepest desire. Under it all, we want joy. But joy evaporates when relationships are filled with division, conflict, and self-centeredness. If there’s no love, the gifts don’t land; the meal doesn’t satisfy; the moment doesn’t heal.
So I want you to see the discipleship link: joy is the fruit; love is the root. If you want the kind of joy that lasts, it grows out of living in the love of God and expressing that love to others.
“The Same Love” Has A Context
When Paul says, “have the same love,” he isn’t asking for a vague sentimental warmth. That word “therefore” (Philippians 2:1) points backward. He’s referring to the love he already showed them in chapter 1.
Paul is writing this letter from prison, chained for the gospel, facing two possible outcomes: freedom or execution. And in that pressure he reveals what love looks like in real life:
“For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:21). He desires “to depart and be with Christ… far better” (v. 23), “nevertheless to remain in the flesh is more needful for you” (v. 24). “I shall remain and continue with you all for your progress and joy of faith” (v. 25).
Do you see what he’s doing? He weighs what is better for him against what is needful for them. That is the “same love” he’s calling the church into.
Biblical love is not merely “I care about you.” It is often: I will lay down my preference for your good.
Love Is A Hard-Pressed Decision
Paul says he is “hard-pressed” (Philippians 1:23). That phrase matters, because it shows us what love often feels like on the inside: pressure, tension, costly choice.
We often treat love as a declarative statement, something we say (“love you!”) or something we feel when it’s convenient. But Paul shows love as a decision at the crossroads of competing interests.
This is where discipleship becomes real. Love is easy in theory. It’s easy when you’re alone, undisturbed, and no one needs anything from you. But love gets tested the moment another person’s needs press against your plans, your time, your comfort, or your rights.
So I’m asking you directly: who “wins” in your life when interests collide? When there’s not enough time, attention, money, patience, or emotional bandwidth, do you consistently center yourself, or do you choose what is better for someone else?
Even small pictures can train us, like the everyday preference of “No, you go first.” Scripture calls us into a lifestyle of preferring one another (cf. Romans 12:10), not occasionally, but as a way of being.
The Battle Is In The Mind
Paul moves from the example of his life to the instruction for ours:
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself” (Philippians 2:3). “Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others” (Philippians 2:4).
Notice where Paul locates the battle: the mind. Love is not mainly a mood. Love is not mainly an emotion. Love is a mindset, a settled orientation that says, “My life is not the center.”
Without renewal, we default to “selfish ambition” and “conceit”, self at the center, self protected, self promoted. And the world won’t correct that default; it rewards it. But the gospel confronts it.
“Lowliness of mind” doesn’t mean you’re worthless. It means you are not the most important person in the room. It means you cannot claim a higher rank of belovedness, as if God loves you more than others. Humility is agreeing with reality: God’s love is not a pedestal for me; it’s a foundation for us.
So I want you to practice this: start each day by choosing the mindset of Philippians 2:3–4 before you feel anything. Don’t wait for loving feelings. Bring your mind under Christ, and let your actions follow.
Love Becomes Real In Costly Practice
This kind of love shows itself in ordinary life, especially when it costs something.
I think of a neighbor who embodies this. After a painful hip replacement, the day after coming home, he’s outside limping, dragging someone else’s trash can down the driveway so they won’t miss trash day. He likely didn’t feel like doing it. But he was determined to look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
That’s Philippians 2 in motion.
And it confirms a truth C.S. Lewis captured well: don’t waste time obsessing over whether you “feel” love; act as if you do, and your heart often follows your obedience. In other words, love doesn’t have to begin as emotion, it can begin as obedience empowered by God.
So here is a practical discipleship assignment for you this Advent:
- Identify one relationship where you are being “hard-pressed.”
- Name the competing interests honestly (yours and theirs).
- Choose one concrete action this week that prefers them, time, attention, service, listening, generosity, forgiveness.
- Do it as worship to Jesus, not as a way to control their response.
This is how we wait for Christ: not passively, but actively, by loving like people who belong to heaven.
Conclusion
Advent trains us to wait well. And today Philippians trains us to wait in love: the love that produces joy, the love Paul modeled in prison, the love that chooses what is needful for others, the love that begins in a renewed mind, and the love that becomes visible in costly everyday practice.
If you want joy, deep, satisfying, lasting joy, don’t chase it directly. Chase the love of God expressed through a humble, others-centered life in Christ. This is what Christmas displays: God did not prioritize His comfort; He sent His Son. And as we wait for His return, we learn to live the same way.
Father, thank You for the consolation we have in Christ, the comfort of Your love, the fellowship of the Spirit, and Your affection and mercy. In this Advent season, prepare our hearts to worship Jesus not only with songs and gatherings, but with a life shaped by His love. Renew our minds where we default to selfish ambition and conceit. Give us true lowliness of mind, humility that esteems others and looks to their interests. Help us love when we are hard-pressed, and make choices that reflect Christ rather than self. Produce in us the kind of joy that comes from walking in Your love. We ask this in Jesus’ name, amen.
Conclusion
Advent trains us to wait well. And today Philippians trains us to wait in love: the love that produces joy, the love Paul modeled in prison, the love that chooses what is needful for others, the love that begins in a renewed mind, and the love that becomes visible in costly everyday practice.
If you want joy, deep, satisfying, lasting joy, don’t chase it directly. Chase the love of God expressed through a humble, others-centered life in Christ. This is what Christmas displays: God did not prioritize His comfort; He sent His Son. And as we wait for His return, we learn to live the same way.
Closing Prayer
Father, thank You for the consolation we have in Christ, the comfort of Your love, the fellowship of the Spirit, and Your affection and mercy. In this Advent season, prepare our hearts to worship Jesus not only with songs and gatherings, but with a life shaped by His love. Renew our minds where we default to selfish ambition and conceit. Give us true lowliness of mind, humility that esteems others and looks to their interests. Help us love when we are hard-pressed, and make choices that reflect Christ rather than self. Produce in us the kind of joy that comes from walking in Your love. We ask this in Jesus’ name, amen.